10 Truly Terrible Christmas Cracker Jokes


It’s just not Christmas dinner without a round of cracker-pulling, paper crowns and some awful Christmas cracker jokes. We asked our Twitter followers for their best and worst corny Christmas cracker pun jokes:



How does Good King Weceslas like his pizza?

Deep pan, crisp and even.

via @nickie72



What’s brown and sneaks around the kitchen?

Mince spies.

via @macdog73 and @Acrolan



What’s a pilot’s favourite crisp flavour?


via @SillyBeardy



Why did the lions not want to play cards with the other animals?

‘Cause they were all cheetahs!

via @LynnCSchreiber, Jump editor



Here are some of our other favourite festive jokes:


What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?

Freeze a jolly good fellow!



Why are Christmas trees very bad at knitting?

Because they always drop their needles.



What do you call a snowman in the summer?

A puddle!



What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?




How do snowmen get around?

By riding an ‘icicle.



What does Santa suffer from if he gets trapped in a chimney?






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